Edit, Add, Appreciate, Energize
October 20, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
Sunday evenings seem to be a time to get revved up for the coming week. It’s at this time when I tend to think about these 3 simple things that will energize me for the coming week – moving me forward in creating the life I want to lead.
- Edit: What can I edit from my life this week? A material object, thoughts, habits, behaviors, people, work or activities that don’t serve me well any more. It could be an article of clothing, a negative perception, a food, an annoying or sniggly trait. Let it go and move on to greener pastures. What is holding you back or what is causing your stress that you need to edit? Where are your bottlenecks or frustrations? Do you have excesses in your life that you need to edit or dial down? How about unfettered consumerism, debt, or unbridled shopping or retail therapy that is out of control. Edit your perspective on your point of enoughness, your needs and wants.
- After all my moves, I’ve realized you can’t just edit once and be done with it for material things. Life changes and your needs, wants and priorities change. That’s why I keep going back to re-edit and simplify. Pare down to the essence of what it is that creates joy and happiness in your life and edit out the clutter – internal or external clutter.
- Add: What can I add to my life that will bring me more joy, happiness, energy, health, wealth or whatever. Reinvent one thing such as perceptions, creations, activities, objects, recipes, people, business contacts, a route to work or walk, a new friend, new music or a new book. How about adding new beliefs or trading some of the old beliefs that may not be true to you now for what works for you as an adult. Take inventory of what your parents taught you that worked when you were 8 or 18, but not when you’re 48. Times have changed and our thought processes and perhaps some beliefs should change as well. Our beliefs rule our behaviors and our results. What can you add or edit in that area? What might be missing in your life that you’d like to add for a fuller, richer experience on Earth?
- Appreciate: What or who needs more appreciating this week? More fully appreciate someone or something and say your gratitude out loud or to yourself for these things. Act on your promptings. Send a card right now to somebody who needs to hear from you: send me an email and I’ll show you how to send a free card at Gail@BizBuilderCards.com. The more you do it, the more it gets ingrained into your brain. Do this one on a daily basis for even more impact than weekly and this can become a new habit that you add which adds to other people’s lives. Appreciate your surroundings, show your acknowledgement to those who serve you, rejoice in your beautiful environment. If it’s not so beautiful – add to it or edit to make it so. Who needs to hear from you today or who needs appreciating?
Decision Making: Fear-Based or Faith-Based
September 25, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
If you are faced with personal or professional decisions and feeling stuck, or if you feel that your decision may not have turned out how you would have liked; take a look at what may be keeping you stuck. Are you mired in ambivalence or scared to make a decision because you are fearful of the unknown? Is it sucking the energy out of you going over and over in your head about “what if” when faced with a big decision?
Don’t allow “what if” to stop you by thinking of things you fear happening. Let “what if” help you sprout wings to soar beyond your imagination can take you. Ask “what if” to bask in possibility thinking and dwell in the realm of creative, faith-based thought. Having faith that what you desire will be met with the resources to make it come true.
We waste loads of emotional energy on decision making, whether it be for work or for our well-being. We know emotion is actually energy in motion and emotional energy makes up about 70% of our total energy. That’s why you may still feel tired after getting much rest if your brain is working overtime dealing with emotional issues.
Are you making your decisions based on fear or faith? We usually get stuck because we are paralyzed by the fear of the unknown and the fear of letting go of what once was and moving on to what could be. We’ve got to reach a point where the fear of the unkown is much less than the current situation. Having faith that your decisions will met positively, faith in yourself for making good decisions based on your instincts and information gathering, and faith that the universe is abundant and will provide for you, if that’s what you desire.
Making decisions based on fear means not going down the path you really want, your outcomes fall short, you short-change yourself, you’re not really truly satisfied – you feel you’ve settled. You are left with a wanting something better. You’re playing not to lose instaed of playing to win. Decisions based on fear leaves you still wanting for more because it isn’t exactly right – there is lack.
Making decisions based on faith keeps you moving forward. Making decisions based on faith may seem awkward at first, but then becomes powerful beyond belief. Decisions based on faith feels like you arrived, it feels right and it feels good. It is empowering. Fear is only in our minds anyway – it’s only a perception, so let it go. Thank it for making you aware and then release that feeling and move forward in faith. It will energize you to no end.
So what is holding you back from a big decision? What decisions would you make if you could do no wrong? What would you do to move forward in your personal or professional life if you had the faith it would work out? I may have mentioned it before and it’s worth repeating: It all works out in the end. If it’s not working out, it’s not the end.
“I’ve Had It” Moments
September 5, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
Have you ever had any “I’ve Had It” moments? Those moments that you know are the turning point of your not tolerating something one more time? It’s the time you make a decision that your life will change from that moment on. It all starts with awareness, then a decision, and finally action towards something else.
I’ve experienced several of those moments recently and looking back at turning points in my life, they stemmed from those moments that I decided in faith and not in fear that I would no longer tolerate the current status quo.
Here are some of my moments:
- Saying goodbye to the W2 life of a j-o-b and hello to the entrepreneurial lifestyle. You don’t get vacation days, you don’t get sick pay, you don’t get your medical insurance covered, but you get your life. I preferred not to be held hostage to other people’s policies for a dental plan to gain my freedom and create my own security.
- Ending toxic relationships – business partnerships, bosses from hell, jerks, personal connections, firing clients. If people are making your life harder rather than easier and they bring you more stress, hurt, hardship, and disrespect than peace, love, happiness and support; then I make some hard decisions and walk. If your sanity or self worth are short-changed in the presence of particular people, lace up your running shoes and exit stage right. Some people are meant to be in your life for a reason, a season, or forever. It’s our task to decide which one it is and gracefully let go if the answer is not forever.
- Not tolerating airport shuttle vans. After over 20 years of traveling 3-8 times per month, being herded like cattle, whiplash at every turn and being subjected to every hotel and terminal stop, I decided to ride in the backs of cars and hire a sedan service from now on. My nerves, my time, my comfort are all saved because of it. What is your time, comfort and sanity worth to you?I’m thinking I should have made this wise decision about taking care of myself in this matter years ago.
- Never again staying at hotels with slippery polyester bedspreads and deluxe velux blankets. Life is too short not to be ensconced in down with nice sheets and pillows. It’s worth it to me to feel supported and cared for when I travel. If we don’t take care of ourselves, who else will do it? I’ve decided I like how I’m treated at some properties over others and I just feel better when I’m in that type of environment. Being welcomed into clean, fresh, polite, friendly, lush environments is rejuvenating after a stressful day.
- I will only live in an inspirational environment that supports who I am becoming as well as who I am now. I won’t tolerate being trapped in my home because of the hot or cold climate. That means surrounding myself with beauty, peace, quiet, great climate,wonderful people, fabulous views and with a simplified palette of the things that bring me joy – namely photos of people and places from a life well lived. How does your environment support who you are now or who you are becoming? Or is it a mere reminder of who you used to be, old ways of thinking, old styles, past lives of who you used to be? I once craved a house full of European antiques. I collected them when I lived in Europe for 10 years and then had to build a house around all of them when I returned stateside. After living with my dream for 20 years, I recently decided they weren’t me any more and divvied them out to friends and dealers. Now I enjoy my fun, simple, minimized furnishings that speak to my style of Comfortable Vitality. It’s refreshing.
Making decisions based on the faith that your situation will be better for it, that you can manifest what you need that supports you better and believing you deserve it can take you to a new level of living. Making decisions based on fear that you can’t afford it, don’t deserve it, what will people think, who do you think you are, or fear that if you let go of one thing another something better won’t appear, doesn’t serve you well.
Become aware of your “I’ve Had It” Moments and recognize when your tolerance level has hit the high water mark. Then take action to change it so you can energize your life for the better. You can’t live to your greatest fulfillment if you keep tolerating things, people, places, situations that don’t support you in your true path. I believe these things are put in our lives to irritate us into making a decision to choose otherwise and to choose our right path that leads us to a better life.
What are you choosing to do? What are you choosing to walk away from or not tolerate any more? What are you choosing to walk toward after you’ve experienced one of those moments? What are you scared of if you are ambivelant about walking away? When you feel stuck, it’s usually because you won’t yet let go of the old before embracing the new. Recognize any patterns of your stress or physical, mental or emotional discomfort. If the patterns continue, those are clues leading up to an “I’ve Had It” moment…. you will know what to do. Then make a decision and take action.
Your Thoughts Reside Outside Your Head: Complaining vs. Engaging
July 22, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
Your thoughts are not only in your mind, they are in your body and in your environment as well. When you change your mind, you change your energy, and when you change your energy, you change your life. Your thoughts can help you bounce back, pull you out of a slump, and increase your resilience or decrease it. You also change the environment around you and influence how people treat you.
When you are caught in a downward energy spiral of complaining, you are focused inward and miss the outside world. You are essentially trapped in your negative energy and your perception is creating your environment to a degree. Dr. Masaru Emoto has scientifically proven that thoughts and feelings affect physical reality. In his book The Hidden Messages in Water, his subjects focused different intentions on frozen water molecules. His mesmerizing findings showed that the water labeled with kind, loving thoughts formed beautiful, symmetrical, snowflake-like, colorful crystals. While the frozen water exposed to negative thoughts and visions formed distorted, incomplete and dull crystals.
Our thoughts do, indeed affect our environment and people around us. Our bodies are 75% water – imagine how our thoughts are affecting the water in our bodies. Our thoughts affect our outcomes.
Research has shown that 70% of our thoughts are negative. Imagine what may happen if you change those thoughts to a positive perspective. When you are lost in complaining or negative thoughts, you miss what’s going on around you. Complaining puts stress on your body, telling it that “what is” is not what you want it to be. Stress affects our bodies with an increase in cortisol – a stress hormone which increases abdominal fat. No wonder American’s are so obese – we’re stressed out!
Be aware of your present moment, your surroundings, your thoughts and be fully engaged in what’s going on now. Pay attention to who you’re with, what you’re doing, how you’re feeling, what you’re thinking and practice being alive and engaged in the present moment. Being fully engaged means bringing your total presence to what you’re doing: mental, emotional, physical and spiritual energy all working together in total participation. This does not bode well for multi-tasking. Practice staying out of your head and into your life. Practice focus, practice positive intention, practice being present and see what happens. Being mindful with positive intentions and positive focus on the future helps us increase our resilience.
Love: Energize Yourself, Your Connections & Your Business
July 11, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully, Wealthy Woman | By Gaia Hart
I’ve been taking the most amazing teleclass about the 7 Mindset and Manifesting Secrets of Multimillionaires as well as reading much about the keys to success. Always open to learning more about the way people operate. What keeps popping up is the word LOVE. When we operate from love, everything else falls into place. When we operate from a powerful center of love and not from fear, everything is where it should be.
As my friend and business partner Mandy told me – everything turns out in the end and if it’s not turning out, it’s not the end.
My friend and business partner Jennifer told me the reason she got into the Send Out Cards business with me is that she always saw my happy, smiling face and the happy people around me at my trade-show tables. She said it looked like so much fun that she wanted to have that in her life. Because I LOVE what I do – almost always have and when I didn’t, I made changes to do what I did love to do. It shows. I can see huge differences in my energy when I’m doing what I love and helping other people do what they love.
Enabling the dreams of others and creating connections, building relationships, helping people and using communication – speaking, writing, Send Out Cards, books, blogs etc. is what gives me energy. People and my relationships to them give me energy. I send several cards every single day to people letting them know I appreciate them and building connections in my life. I know that love surrounds me – beauty surrounds me.
That’s why I moved to the beach. Walking on the beach 3 times per day with my dog Madison – I love it, she loves it. It’s inspiring. It makes me happy to see her happy. She was a rescue who was a puppy mill breeder. For 5 years she lived outside in a 10 x 10 pen in Missouri with no shelter, 5 other dogs with a cement pad and chainlink fence. She never had the pleasure of feeling her legs run. She never had the joy of romping more than 10 feet. Now when I see her face light up as she chases waves, squirrels, birds, bunnies – it brings me such joy. We have a connection that we both love our freedom to roam and run and romp as we choose.
What more can you put into your life that you love? What can you remove that you don’t love? What connections can you make to add more love into your life? Where can you live to do what you love? What connections can you sever in order to move closer to love in other areas of your life?
My friend and business partner Paul sent me this profound 3-minute video that’s all about love and connections. I’m a sucker for animal stories and this one is quite moving about the power of love. Get out your hankies – I’m pretty sure it will move you to tears as it did for me. Click HERE to watch it.
Are You Living in Your Right Brain or Your Left Brain? Piles or Files?
May 21, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
Where are you most comfortable living… in your left brain or your right brain?
Left brainers, elbies, are more comfortable linear thinking, number crunching, logical, facts, details, math, science, rules, thinking, reality based and safe.
Right brainers, arbies, are more creative, free flowing, mind mapping, artsy, musical, big picture, visionary, risk taking, feelings, imagination and fantasy.
I recently was directed to this website from an Australian newspaper that has a graphic of a dancer. Whether you see her spinning clockwise or counterclockwise can tell you which side of your brain you’re living in at that very moment.
Check it out: http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,22556281-661,00.html
I found I could only see her spinning in one direction. I couldn’t for the life of me visualize how she she could be seen spinning in the other direction…. until I started reading the words that represented the other side of the brain. When I read those words, I could then see her spinning in the other direction automatically and immediately. How weird is that??!!
That’s how fast you can switch from using one side of your brain to the other. From all these kinds of tests over the years, I’ve found I sit right in the middle on the fence and can easily swing from one side to the other depending on the situation.
To help you access and integrate easier for problem solving, creative thinking or number crunching; try throwing something between your hands or juggling. Throwing something back and forth helps you integrate. Growing dendrites on both sides of your brain can also be accomplished by little activities such as brushing your teeth with the opposite hand, eating with the other hand or European style, crossword puzzles, Soduko or other memory games.
Elbies and Arbies also store things differently. To be most efficient, figure out which side is more comfortable for you to live in. Elbies tend to store things vertically behind closed doors such as file cabinets, closets, drawers, hangers etc. These are the neat desk people.
Arbies tend to store things horizontally and within plain view – these are called piles. Right brainers need the visual stimulation to remind them to do something. If it’s out of sight, it’s out of mind. They prefer hooks to hangers and shelving to drawers.
The rest of us in the middle are the anal retentive creative types – horizontal stacking in-boxes that are labeled. A mixture of both styles.
Figure out your style and your preference, then organize your space around your style to feel most at ease, to find things more easily and then know how to access your other side of your brain and call in the reinforcements when you need them.
Time Management vs. Self Management
April 19, 2008 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
After reading and ruminating on the book The 4-Hour Workweek for a few months; I’ve been keenly aware of how I spend my time. Time, unlike money, once spent can never be recovered and so I guard my time more fiercely than ever these days and really watch my boundaries. Putting boundaries on my time and allowing people, things and stuff to enter the forcefield is more of a conscious decision at this point in my life.
We really cannot manage time, we can only manage ourselves in the space of our time. That means getting very clear on what to do and what to drop and what to outsource and what is important and what is urgent and what doesn’t really matter that much at all. My business partner often says, “If you don’t have enough time, you don’t have enough team.” I also think if you don’t have enough time, re-think the things you’re stuffing into that time and make hard choices.
To help manage myself in my time, I use a color coding system in my hard-copy Daytimer. I also use a Google Calendar so my virtual assistants can see my schedule and when I need time, I just block it out on the schedules so nobody else can grab that time slot. I use a paper method as well as digital because I’ve had many computer gremlins and I need to know I have a back-up system in case the computer or internet goes down. Select colors that represent personal, professional, deadlines, obligations etc. If one color is dominating your schedule – analyze why that is and make changes.
Since moving to the beach, I’ve decided that I won’t take any incoming calls or work until after 9am. A purposeful choice that this is the time zone in which I live and just because the East Coast is up and running, doesn’t mean I need to be at my desk by 5am so they can call me at their convenience. I’ve also adopted the motto – no more rushing. I’ve rushed to catch planes, make deadlines, be available to everybody’s emails and calls for over 20 years and I needed a break, hence no postings for a couple months while I decompressed after I moved out to California. I realized it was me allowing all those other things to take my time and it was only me who had the power to take back my time. It’s our choice.
I’m reminded of the demonstration I saw about time management in a workshop – by having sand represent all the little schnitzy things you need to do and having ping pong balls represent the things that matter in your life. If you fill a vase with sand and then try to put in the ping pong balls, they won’t fit. But by putting in the ping pong balls first – putting the things that matter most to you first in your life, then pouring the sand into the vase; the sand fills in the empty spaces and everything will fit in the vase. It fits snugly, but it fits and anything that doesn’t fit is only the sniggly things that don’t matter so much anyway.
So how are you managing yourself inside your time zone? My friend Kathie makes phone dates to catch up with friends – she uses her beach walking time to talk on her cell with good friends so she can exercise while talking. My friend Beth uses her treadmill time to chat. A realtor buddy takes no incoming calls before 11 – he reserves the morning for himself. I’m working on only taking calls and appointments Tuesday – Thursday so I can have Mondays and Fridays completely to myself. I’m not totally there yet, it’s a work in progress, but I’m conscious of it. If I need to do things on these days, then I’m blocking out time during the week to do as I choose.
I will not get to only working 4 hours per week- I don’t thing I would even like to choose that. I truly enjoy what I do and it keeps me energized. Often people ask me if I work “full time”. Full time and part time are mindsets of the W2 working world. As an Entrepreneur, I just do my life. I have several companies and I just do some more than others as things dictate. Sometimes I focus on my work 60 hours in one week and sometimes 3 hours in one week – it all depends on what is happening in my life at the time – go with the flow. Entrepreneurs don’t do rules very well.
So how do you set your personal boundaries, your time boundaries and how do you manage yourself within the time you have? What is your time zone? Are you in the zone in the mornings or evenings? When are you brain dead and when are you most sharp and creative? Work your stuff around your bio-rhythms and when you are most productive and be very conscious of who and what you allow inside your boundaries in order to keep your energy for the things that really matter most.
Improve Your Happiness
November 26, 2007 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By Gaia Hart
How happy are you really? After meeting hundreds of people in the past couple months in my sessions, at tradeshows and over Thanksgiving hearing their stories; it’s interesting to note just how many people are not happy with their situations. They seem to be lumbering along at mediocre not willing to seek out alternatives, yet not wanting to completely accept their position. I’m here to share some insider secrets to happiness.
There are several books on the subject. One in particular is What Happy People Know by Dan Baker & Cameron Stauth. There is also a terrific website by Dr. Martin Seligman at Authentic Happiness. Dr. Seligman’s main mission has been the promotion of the field of Positive Psychology. This discipline includes the study of positive emotion, positive character traits, and positive institutions. Take some of his surveys about general happiness, gratitude, grit and strength.
There are two main building blocks to happiness: pleasures and gratifications. Pleasures are sensual and emotional while gratifications are those activities that call on our skills and strengths and give us a sense of a job well done. Gratifications can be further divided into our signature strengths – marks of character such as perseverance, kindness, curiosity and humility. We are most fully engaged in life when we are part of something that isn’t just for ourselves. True happiness lies in building on our strengths and not rooting out our flaws.
In researching true happiness, Seligman noted that the benefits from these 3 simple exercises lasted for as much as 6 months:
- Write a letter of gratitude to someone from your past who has been particularly kind to you , but who has never been properly thanked and deliver the card in person.
- Every eveinng for a week, write down 3 good things that happened that day and explain what brought them about.
- Take the Signature Strength Quiestionnaire at Authentic Happiness to identify your own strengths and then use one of our top 5 strengths in a different way every day for a week.
A creative way to send a gratitude card or lots of them for the holidays to help shore up your happiness and spirits is at BizBuilder Cards. You can even put your own photo or photos of your recipients on the cards and include a gift card or have the company insert the card into a box of gourmet goodies to pack a real punch. The best part is if you don’t know anybody to send a card to, they have a section called Send Your Love where you can send a card to somebody who needs to know others are thinking about them and sending support and love. Sending a card of acknowledgement is like driving a vehicle for the Law of Attraction – it puts you in an attitude of gratitude when you write it and also brightens somebody’s day when they receive it – a twofer!
One of humanity’s greatest needs is to feel loved, acknowledged and appreciated. Who needs to hear from you today? Why not send a card or postcard and start improving your happiness as well as the happiness of others who receive your greetings. Check out these custom greeting cards for an easy way to spread joy at holiday time and any time. Cheers – I hope your Thanksgiving was filled with happiness and pecan pie. (that makes me happy :-).
