Living Happier, Healthier & Hartier for the New Year: 8 More Joyful Tips

January 12, 2014 | Posted in Leading Hartfully | By

Now that you’ve had time to digest all the holiday food and forget about the resolutions you made a week ago; I’m giving you more to chew on and more ideas for live-long revolutions as opposed to resolutions which you break in a matter of days or weeks. Here are eight more ideas to help you live happier, healthier and Hartier this year and into the future.

  1. Give your time and attention to something, somebody other than yourself. Volunteering for a favorite cause or charity brings us a feeling of doing good and that invites happiness and better health into our lives. The feeling of empathy that comes with volunteering produces better feelings than if we do other things such as give money, blood or other altruistic behavior says a study published in the journal of Social Science and Medicine.
  2. In relation to #5 in the last posting about feeling a sense of calm and having more order in your life; outsourcing the things that don’t bring you joy can leave you feeling a sense of happiness by employing others to do those duties. I’ve bought back several hours per month by outsourcing grocery shopping, regular shopping and errands at the drug store through online purchasing. There’s something very satisfying about having my food brought to my door without me needing to endure crowded parking lots, long cashier lines, and too many carts in the aisles. Doing my grocery shopping in about 7 minutes with delivery the next day makes me very, very happy and allows more free time for fun and play.  Outsourcing cleaning, taxes, car repair, landscaping and some cooking also makes me giggle with glee when I don’t have to do those things. One of my mentors outsources the gassing up and cleaning of his car and another hires somebody to pack out, and put together her home including groceries in the fridge for a household move while she goes on vacation. She has found a way to outsource her stress. I say BRAVO!
  3. Find your flow. How often do you notice that you’re in the flow and in the groove of something that you don’t notice time flying by? Being in the zone of flow where your talents and skills match the challenge of the activity is what professor Mihaly Czikszentimihalyi called flow when your full attention is enveloped and engaged  in the activity you’re doing right now. I find myself in flow when I’m writing, creating, skiing, doggie walking, hiking in the forest our mountains, talking with friends, reading, being artsy, teaching and problem solving. What puts you in flow?
  4. As a Certified Laughter Leader, I’ve studied the effects of laughter on our central nervous system and the effect on others around us. In the book Anatomy of an Illness, Norman Cousins found that 10 minutes of good belly laughter can produce enough positive endorphins to produce 2 hours of restful sleep in those with chronic pain without any medication. Laughing stimulates the thymus gland which aids in the production of T cells which helps fight diseases. So laughter not only connects people, it stimulates oxygen in the blood and helps make you more healthy and more fun to be around. Laugh for the health and happiness of it all. Find your sense of humor about your situations and you will become more happy and healthy.
  5. Practicing the art of gratitude and being in a constant state of being grateful helps boost our happiness factor. A few years ago, one of my mentors suggested answering the ubiquitous question of “How are you doing?” with “Grateful! And you?” I’ve been using that response ever since to remind myself that I’m in a constant state of gratitude and gratitude brings good vibes. Try writing in a gratitude journal to get you started on focusing what is good in your life. What we focus on expands and where our thoughts go, energy flows. Focus on gratitude. Take the Gratitude Challenge here.
  6. Add beauty, joyful things, and pleasantries into your day and delete things that cause you concern or stress. This means taking a look at your spaces at home and at work or your home office. Do your surroundings inspire you? Does the view out your windows represent beauty? Do you have fresh flowers? Is your furniture comfy and working for you? Do you have a favorite mug, great music playing in your space, a short commute, a job you love that is on purpose and in alignment with your personal purpose?
  7. Get some sleep. Reuters news service reported on a study published in the journal of Science that sleep quality has a greater influence on the ability to enjoy your day than household income and even marital status. Other research I’ve seen says that we must get at least 8 hours of REM sleep in order for the good hormones to kick in and for our bodies to regenerate what it needs in order to make us more effective. I’m a personal fan of naps, especially with my fuzzy little doxi dog, Fozzi who converts to my nap hat. Shown in photo above. Another twofer – fuzzy puppies and sleep. Aaaaaahhhhh, life’s simple pleasures offer such joy.
  8. Are you with a partner that brings you joy, what about your other relationships? Do you have love in your life on many levels? Happiness is linked to the strength of the bonds in our lives. Put things you love in your line of sight to lift your mood. Those who have better or more intimacy with their life partner report higher happiness levels than those with multiple partners or those without partners. Being with the wrong partner conversely affects your happiness….. Duh! Not sure a big study was needed for that finding?!

There you have it. A kick start to your year of living happier, healthier and Hartier for 2014 and for years to come. If you have other ideas or have found other research to improve the happiness factor, let me know. I’ll be sharing more in the months to come. Stay tuned as I’ll be sharing monthly Keys to Energize, Practice Safe Stress and Pump Up Your Productivity and Have More Fun.  Happy New Year!

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Breaking Through Your Threshold Thermostat into Your OH! Zone of Brilliance

January 1, 2014 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully, Wealthy Woman | By

We are responsible for our own success or lack thereof. We are responsible for the outer world we have created from our inner world. We are responsible for our internal threshold thermostat for success we have set for ourselves that stems from learned behaviors back when we didn’t even know we were learning them. Some experts call it a Success Blueprint, some call it an Upper Limit Barrier, others call it our personal glass ceiling. Whatever you call it, you’ve set your own personal threshold thermostat at your comfort zone and when we stay comfy, cozy in our comfort zone, we are no longer learning and we cannot reach our gifts of brilliance.

When we are children, we internalize ideas of how the world is and how we are in it based on what we heard from parents, siblings, school mates, teachers and coaches. We grow up thinking it’s all true when it really isn’t. It’s our job to shine a light on these beliefs and pick them apart to see if it really is true or just something that somebody else believed and stuck on us and we took it with us and hang on to it. It’s not so much as learning about new paths to success, as it is about unlearning some of the stuff that we took to be true, that really isn’t.

We may have picked up that we mustn’t outshine others, or earn more than our parents, or to be smarter than our siblings or at least not act like it. We may have learned that we’re always just shy of what we wanted, don’t have enough time, enough money, or are enough. These are the false personal thermostats we have set for ourselves that need to be broken open to allow the light of truth in so we can move forward and re-set our new personal threshold thermostats.

Once we let go and shed the old stories and realize what we may have thought to be true, really isn’t; we are more open to the possibilities of recalibrating our thresholds and hold a new belief that we can be wildly successful, outrageously wealthy and gracious and giving at the same time, inconceivably happy and loving, and joyful beyond all recognition. It is our choice to move our thresholds up and up and up. It may be only a few degrees at a time because it may feel weird to be that happy or successful or wealthy and it’s uncomfortable. You may not think you deserve so much success in so many areas of your life.

When you notice yourself worrying too much, criticizing, irritated for not much reason or having accidents or illnesses; then you may be bumping up against one of your former thermostat thresholds. Maybe things are cooking along too well for you and it’s getting hot, so you self- sabotage in order to bring you back down to Earth. After all, who do you think you are, Ms. Smarty Pants? When you notice those things going on, then you need to take stock and see it for what it is; your old ego pulling you back down to your comfort zone because it’s like a pair of old jeans. Once you realize what’s happening; try another tack and ease your threshold back just a bit until you get comfortable with that setting, then keep easing up until you can really turn up the heat and roll with it. Breaking through those old barriers to get to your OH! Zone of brilliance is liberating.

Practice turning up the heat in all areas of your life and allow yourself the luxury of feeling great in all those areas. Know that if worry, agitation with friends, colleagues or mates and hiding feelings start creeping in, that you are at another threshold that needs to be pushed back so you can be on your merry way towards your area of brilliance just beyond the old thermostat thresholds. Know that every time you backtrack in fear or revert back to your old thinking and ways of moving through the world, that your threshold closes in on you and it gets hard and harder to break through. Make this be the year that you keep moving your threshold past your comfort zone and into your zone of brilliance….. the OH! zone.

You know when you’re entering your zone of brilliance when you feel at peace, in the zone, your work feels like play, you feel joy and gratitude, you feel like you get to do what you do in service to the world and not that you have to do what you do in service to others and you feel that what you’re doing is a full expression of yourself. You feel fulfilled, you feel fully expressed in all areas. It takes time to get all your duckies in order and it takes concentrated focus and a level of self- awareness. It takes reflection, thought and honesty to be 100% responsible for what you create beyond your thermostat threshold to catapult you into the OH! zone. Take some time before the year gets ahead of you and don’t waste another day with a low thermostat. Take some time to take stock and make a promise to turn up your thermostat threshold for success to see what it feels like to live in your OH! zone of brilliance. All the best of success to you in your journey.

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7 Things You Can Ditch To Increase Your Happy Factor

December 28, 2013 | Posted in Leading Hartfully, Living Hartfully | By

I wanted to start out the year on the right foot….or is it the left foot. I prefer goofy footed. Here are some things you can delete from your day that can make your life a lot easier and maybe, just maybe a lot happier. If we choose to let go of what isn’t serving us in relation to the greater good of our life as we work towards the greater good of our family, our organizaton, or the world; then we release bad energy from our lives and expand on the good energy and the happiness factor.  Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:

1. Give up your need to always be right. There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer.  Dr. Phil says “Would you rather be right, or be happy?” You make the call.

 2. Ditch your need for control. Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

3. Toss out your self-defeating self-talk. Some studies show that 70% of our self talk is negative – just think how many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating.

4. Drop complaining and criticism from your vocabulary. Give up your constant need to complain and criticize– people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking. Read the book by Byron Katie Loving What Is. Think of the use of Transformational Vocabulary – what we say to others and what we say to ourselves – see #3 above on defeating self talk, can have a tremendous impact on our energy. Think of the statement “I can’t do that.” vs. “I won’t do that.” vs. “I’ll find a way to do that even though I don’t yet know how.” vs. “I’m not allowed to do that”. Hmmmmmm. Start measuring and weighing your words. Practice WAIT: Why Am I Talking?

5. Lose your need to impress others. Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take of all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly. There will always be some better and others worse off than you. Be in competition with yourself. Keep your eyes in your lane and swim the best race you can. Do you think Michael Phelps won all those gold medals by keeping his eyes on all the lanes of his competitors? He kept his eyes focused on his goal and his the target with all he had.

6. Stop your excuses.  We limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.  We can spend as much energy making up the exuceses than just doing it. Offering excuses to yourself is draining your energy. Live above the line, buck up and just do it.

7. Relese your need for attachment.  Ekhart Tolle describes in his book A New Earth, our need to cultivate a healthy detachment to things. You get better and better at with time and practice. Letting go of stuff, letting go of things that don’t really matter gives us a peace and serenity. Practice letting go of the past and cut some of the emotional attachments you have to stuff so it frees yo to be happy. The same is true for detaching from some of the old habits that don’t serve you any more. Try non-traditional celebrating over the holidays with less stress.

Just try some of these things to see how it lightens your load. You may just find a little more peace, joy, happiness and a new light shining from within after you ditch the baggage of things that don’t serve you any more. AND you just may feel lighter and better to serve others with your new found happiness and light.  Happy Holidays!

 

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What Colors Can Do to Specialize Your Space and Affect Your Mood

November 8, 2013 | Posted in Living Hartfully | By

Colors have a powerful effect on mood, and work their magic spell by helping us get in touch with our emotions. Colors can soothe, inspire, energize, and rejuvenate, and they set the mood and atmosphere of a room. So what is your home doing for you? Is your living room a drab den or a sensational salon? What about the bedroom? Is it a run-down retreat or a palace of passion? And what changes can you make to ensure that your living spaces are working for you? Understanding the rules of color and mastering the secrets of color mixing will help you create the right mood for your rooms. There are no rights and wrongs — the most important things are to have fun and to be creative. And the simplest way to revitalize your home is with paint.

Color wheel. Do you want warm or cool, dramatic or neutral? The color wheel is an invaluable tool for choosing the hues, tints, and shades based on your personal preferences. An unlimited amount of color combinations are possible. The wheel is divided into 12 equal sections, each displaying a primary, secondary, or tertiary color. The “warm” and “hot” colors are on the right hand side of the wheel, and the “cool” and “cold” colors are on the left. Black, white, and grey are the neutral colors, and don’t appear on the color wheel.

Primary colors. These are the three key colors that cannot be formed by any combination of other colors — red, blue, and yellow.

Secondary colors. When you mix equal amounts of two primary colors you get secondary colors — purple, green, and orange.

Red + Blue = Purple

Red + Yellow = Orange

Blue +Yellow = Green

Tertiary colors. Mixing primary colors with secondary colors in a 2:1 ratio will produce tertiary colors — red-orange, yellow-orange, red-purple, blue-purple, blue-green, and yellow-green.

How to use the color wheel:

Knowing the colors that harmonize and work with each other will help you create a tasteful theme and avoid making a rainbow riot. Here are some basic color schemes to get you started:

Complementary colors are found opposite each other, such as red and green or yellow and purple. They always go well together, hence the term complementary, and are easy on the eyes.

The meaning of colors:

Green. Bountiful in nature, the color green is life, growth, and health — a reassuring sign of renewal and regeneration. Situated in the center of the spectrum, green brings balance and order. The eye makes no adjustment to accommodate green striking the retina, making it a restful and soothing color.

Pink. Gentle and soft, delicate and feminine, pink quietly nurtures and soothes. It is the tender side of red, and invokes feelings of romance and enchantment. Bright pinks are energetic and youthful, while vibrant pinks are full of passion, though they are not as aggressive as reds.

Orange. Warm and sensuous, orange represents ripeness and happiness. It is a fun and exhilarating color that promotes feelings of excitement and hope. Orange is a combination of red and yellow, and shares common traits with both. It is forceful and demands attention, but is less intense than red, being mellowed by the presence of yellow.

Brown. Natural and organic, down-to-earth, and neutral. Though sometimes saddled with a reputation for being boring, brown is representative of wholesomeness and goodness, and promotes feelings of stability and order. It is simplicity in a chaotic world. Lighter shades are particularly soothing, while darker hues are confident and dependable.

Red. The color of passion, romance, love, and lust. Red is hot, fiery, and tempestuous — a powerful and intense color that evokes a sense of urgency and excitement, and stimulates the heart to beat faster. Red demands attention and will bring out the extrovert in you. It’s not for the shrinking violets.

Blue. Cool and calming, blue symbolizes serenity, purity, and loyalty. In many cultures blue has an important role in religious belief as a bringer of peace. Darker shades project an image of power and authority — police uniforms are blue, and a blue power suit is a favorite of the corporate world. Lighter shades are refreshing and uplifting — they encourage creativity and stimulate the imagination.

Purple. Full of magic and mystery, purple is the color of royalty, and represents opulence, wealth, luxury, and magnificence. Balancing hot red and cool blue, it has the properties of both. Purple can be uplifting, and is a soothing balm to mind and nerves. It also offers a sense of spirituality, and it symbolizes intuition and imagination.

Yellow. Representing the warmth and radiance of the summer sun, yellow is energetic, vibrant, cheerful, and optimistic. It’s the good mood hue, and shines with hope, happiness, and joy. Yellow enhances the intellect, activates the memory, and aids communication and concentration.

Upgrading your living spaces:

There are plenty of other ways to bring a burst of color into your life without the use of a paintbrush.

Living room

Use these additions to make your dream living room warm, cozy, and inviting. I found a wild rug and I mean wild in color and pattern and just HAD to have it. It so happens that it perfectly matched the cicles design on my chairs and my apple-green wild couch. Something happened on my way to being “of a certain age” that I replaced all my silk Chinese traditional dark green rugs with some crazy patterns and fun colors. Guessing I’m feeling like a freer spirit and can decorate however I want and this makes me happy…it’s light and luscious.

  • Decorative throw pillows and cushions — add some fresh color and a touch of style and vitality.
  • A colorful painting or digital photographs — take a few snaps in the park or around town, and frame the best images to create your own art.
  • Colored pillar candles, plates, and vases — place on a sideboard or table, and think of grouping them in threes. Objects look more interesting in groups than on their own.
  • Flowers — let nature enhance your living space.

 

Bedroom

  • Your decision of whether you  want your bedroom to be a passion palace or a blissful oasis will  determine your color choice.
  • Layer your room with linen — use embroidered sheets, satin quilts, pleated cotton bed skirts, and cozy and colorful drapes.
  • Change the lighting — buy colored lampshades and painted light bulbs.
  • Rugs — add to your room’s rich and lush appeal.
  • Artwork — buy a huge canvas or print or hang your own creations.

 

Bathroom

Your bathroom is a serene sanctuary, and there are some simple ways of adding sparkle to your cool, calm oasis.

  • Accessorize — consider a decorative mirror, colorful containers, pictures, matching towel sets, and decorative towel bars.
  • A colorful rug — freshen up the floor.
  • Color-changing faucet — provide quite literally a splash of color, as the water changes color as it runs through the faucet.

 

Colorful tricks

  • To make a room appear larger — paint all surfaces with the same color from the warm end of the color wheel. Paint the ceiling a lighter shade to make it appear higher. Large furniture appears smaller if it is the same color as the walls.
  • To make a room feel cozier — use colors from the warm end of the color wheel. A warm color on the ceiling will make it feel lower, and therefore comfier and more intimate.

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Ergonomics Improve Personal Energy

October 30, 2013 | Posted in Living Hartfully | By

When my friend Sharon told me she was an Industrial Hygienist, I had no idea what that term meant.  Did she do dental work in manufacturing areas?  I found out that she deals with the workplace environment to ensure a safe and comfortable place of employment.  Ergonomics is one of her fields and is essentially the study of what makes our bodies most comfortable in relation to light, sound, movement, temperature, air quality, and our furniture.  Since the average office worker now sends and receives 52 phone messages, 106 e-mails, 8 pieces of mail, 5 faxes, and 28 texts per day; we need to be comfortable doing all these things.

 

Here are some insider secrets on how ergonomics can help increase your personal energy and your health while you are at your office so you don’t have to go home from work exhausted.  Posture, type of furniture, work organization, and other personal space practices all work together to affect fatigue, stress, strains, or injuries.  Follow these pointers and you will have more energy left over at the end of the day to play with your kids, your pets, your partner, or your friends. And playing as hard as we work is what leads to a balanced life with less stress and more fun since our work hours have increased by 20% and our leisure time has decreased by 32% since 1973, we need to make the most out of what leisure time we have and be sure we have the energy to enjoy it.

 

Have a seat:

* Working for long periods of time without a break in an uncomfortable position can lead to headaches, eye-strain, and loss of concentration.  Moving within your range of comfort zones and various postures is good for your spine, muscles, joints, and circulatory system.  Get up and stretch to get the blood flowing into your limbs and to allow your left brain and right brain to integrate more readily by focusing on something else for a while. You will come back refreshed.

 

* Find your various comfort zones which may include standing or a more upright posture when speaking on the phone to enhance the voice by opening up the diaphragm.  It may include a more relaxed position when using the computer.  I find myself doing all my writing on my comfy couch on a lap desk, while my antique writing desk goes untouched for that purpose.  I can’t seem to get creative while sitting at a slant-top desk.  Use what works best for you.

 

* Your chair should be of comfortable height with your fee firmly planted on the floor or on a footrest.  Shorter people may have back strain if their feet cannot touch flatly on the floor since their backs must arch to get their feet to touch.  Footrests can alleviate such a strain – this goes for airplane seats, buses, bleachers etc. I have found a box of copy paper or a file box is just the right height for someone 5’ 2”!

* The backs of your knees and the underside of your thighs should be free of pressure with enough space under your desk for your knees and thighs to clear should you cross your legs or decide to use a footrest.

 

* Your lower back should be supported.  If you are in a hotel room – use the blanket draped over the back of the desk chair and a pillow or rolled towel behind the lower part of your back.  There are also portable back pillows for conferences and road trips to help support your back. Your mother was right – avoid slouching forward as it impedes breathing and fatigues the back.

* Your shoulders should be relaxed with your hands, wrists, and forearms aligned in a straight, neutral position.  If you use armrests, your shoulders should be relaxed with your elbows in near your body when they are resting on the chair.  Your forearms should make a 90 degree angle to your upper arm when poised at the keyboard to aid in bloodflow to the fingers.   Avoid resting your hands and wrists on sharp edges which will impede circulation.

 

Technical Difficulties:

* Your computer keyboard should be directly in front of you and  sometimes it may be in your lap to change positions. Your hand should be relaxed when holding the mouse and if you are not actively using it, rest your hand elsewhere. Practice typing and clicking with a light touch and clean your tracking mechanism regularly so it moves effortlessly. Your keyboard slope should allow your wrists to be straight.

 

 

* Do you refocus your eyes intermittently on distant objects or get up and walk around to give your eyes a rest.  Position your monitor to avoid glare on the screen – by reducing ceiling lights, or positioning the monitor between lights, or by using a glare-reduction filter.   If you wear bifocals, avoid tilting your head back to see the monitor. Your monitor should be about arm’s length from your face just below eye level, and directly in front of you or a bit to the side if your document holder is the main thing you are focusing on in front of you. By properly positioning your monitor, you will reduce eye strain, and muscle fatigue in your shoulders and upper back.

 

* After switching from a very active job to become a computer jockey, I noticed my arm going numb and tingling in the fingers.  I found out from my chiropractor that I had huge knots in my shoulders from improper chair/desk height and from scrunching the phone between my shoulder and my head. Even though you may take a break from the stresses which caused these ailments, the muscle knots do not go away on their own – you must have them worked out by a massage therapist.  I have found freedom from tension knots by purchasing a cordless headset telephone and by having preventive massages on a regular basis.  Sometimes we need to listen to our bodies when they tell us something is askew.

 

Lights, Sound, Action!:

* Fluorescent lighting can cause headaches from the constant buzz and flicker.  Natural light or full-spectrum lighting can increase your productivity by 255 and reduce headaches as well.

 

* Avoid assaulting noises or sounds which disturb your natural rhythms.  For some people white noise helps drown out unpleasant, distracting sounds.  For others playing soft music with the tonalities of smooth jazz or classical is more energizing.

 

* Getting fresh air during the day helps boost your energy along with getting some sunlight and vitamin D from the sunshine.  A short walk outdoors will help breathe new life into your during the afternoon slump.  Some buildings are known for their toxic air or sick building maladies.  Oddly enough, the Environmental Protection Agency had some of the worst air in the country until they took steps to rectify it.

 

So Ergonomics plays a big part in personal energy – even though I could not find ergonomics in 3 of my dictionaries and thesauruses which were printed in the 1970’s.  We’ve come a long way in detecting what makes our bodies comfortable and most productive.  In the end, it is an individual choice on what makes us comfortable.  All we have to do is sit still long enough to really listen to it.

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